Posts by Amber Rose

26

did/do you you belive the examples in the yearbooks?

by highdose in

the ones where the witch doctor surcomes to his own spell that he put on the brothers, or when the 5 drs physicaly force the sister to have the blood transplant?

etc etc where the person was praying and ... ding dong!

there appear the jw's..... can we belive it??

Amber Rose

I never read the yearbook (I never understood what the point of it was supposed to be) but other people I knew did and would talk about the stories that they read, with much awe and admiration. It must have been in the 2005 Yearbook. There was a story that people thought was just wonderful. Oh, the courage, strength and spirituality of this missionary couple. They had a baby and it died. The whole village was so sad for them and wanted to have some sort of ceremony to comfort the greiving couple. But that would have meant false worship of some kind. Therefore, the couple had to pretend that they were not upset that their baby died. They acted happy in order to give a witness to their village.

I thought that was the worst story that I ever heard. God must really be an @$$hole if that is what he expects of his servants, which I don't believe that he does.

I think that the stories are made up, as are the ones in WT lessons about small children in 3rd world countries sending in their food money to the WTS.

2

If they said this, at least they would be interesting

by Amber Rose in

hello, we are here to tell you that the world as you know it is about to be destroyed and very few survivors will be left.

would you like to be one of those survivor?

you see, we are living in the last days.

Amber Rose

but in my last couple of years as a Witness, I was mulling over how to say exactly that to householders w/o getting laughed off their porches.

Me too! I got so tired of the same routine - everyone take a not a home or two, do a call on the far edge of territory, coffee break, three more calls and back to the hall. Hey! Aren't we supposed to be saving people's lives here? Jehovah is sooo going to kill us for not taking the job seriously. That's what happens when you try to make sence out of nonsence - you realize that its nonsence and walk away.

2

If they said this, at least they would be interesting

by Amber Rose in

hello, we are here to tell you that the world as you know it is about to be destroyed and very few survivors will be left.

would you like to be one of those survivor?

you see, we are living in the last days.

Amber Rose

Hello, we are here to tell you that the world as you know it is about to be destroyed and very few survivors will be left. Would you like to be one of those survivor? You see, we are living in the last days. After Jesus died and was resurrected he went to heaven where he waited around until 1914 to be given the throne by his father, Jehovah. As the new ruling king, Jesus' first act was to throw Satan out of heaven and onto the earth. You can see ample evidence of this just by reading the newspapers since 1914. Each has more bad news than the last! After throwing Satan to the earth, something that Jesus apparently was not pleased with, he decided that he should choose some people to remain on the earth - because even though most of the people were bad, the planet itself was still good. So he took a look around at all the churches and he decided that he liked the Bible Students (as the Jehovah's Witnesses were known back in those days) the best. So you see, the only way to survive Jesus' war with Satan on the earth (or Armageddeon - the Great day of God Jehovah) is to join the Jehovah's Witnesses. Now, here, take these magazines and I'll be back in two weeks with more.

Instead of this -

Hello. Do you think we will ever see a world without war? The Bible says we will. (read one sentence out of the Bible). Now, here, take these magazines and I'll be back in two weeks with more.

16

assembly hall video

by drew sagan in

jw
friends

seeing this video brought back some memories.

i got baptized at this place in 99'.

the guy actually takes the video camera back into the changing room behind the baptism pool (memories!

Amber Rose

The videographer put up a text disclaimer about the "place where they're going to beat kids during the meeting" but we know that to be the case, whether he said he was kidding or not.
I thought it was a bit funny that there was no commentary on the video except for that remark!

15

Funny things 2 say abt apostate infilationers in the congo

by badboy in

jw
friends

they seek those apostate pimperels here.

they seek them there.

they seek them everywhere.

Amber Rose

There just aren't enough posts like this one.

22

Young people ask Awake January 2010 Why don't boys like me? Girls take please!

by restrangled in

jw
friends

ok, i'm pissed here is the advice from prepubescents from somewhere and some highlights from the article.

my comments in parenthesis.. "dress modestly, and maintain good hygiene.

" (just out of curiosity, does anyone know a teen-aged girl that is not obsessed with hygiene and who's view of modesty are they referring to?).

Amber Rose

This does not make sence to me at all. Why does the Awake care if GIRLS are liked by BOYS? This is not a question regarding adults. A girl should not be concerned if boys like her. Not until she is "past the bloom of youth". Don't even THINK about dating until you are in a situation where marriage is a definite possibility. Certainly if you are in school, you would not be ready to get married. Everyone knows that "liking" leads to dating which in turn leads to marriage. As a young person, you should be focused on more important things like developing a strong relationship with Jehovah ("do not forsake the Creator in the days of your young manhood [or womanhood]") and doing things for old people in the congregation. Of course by following this advice you will become more attractive to all people that you encounter. In fact, worldly people may be so impressed by you that they will become JW's themselves! - There, I should have written this article for them.

If not writing the article that I just wrote, all they can do is state the obvious and give horrible advice

- Try not to stink

- When talking to boys, try not to be a smart-ass

- Make sure that the boy appears to be smarter than you (this is called "being respectful")

- Fix yourself up but make sure not to look too skanky. A boy's friends may make fun of him if they think his girlfriend is a ho.

29

Egyptians rubbing poo-poo in their boo-boos

by drew sagan in

the title of this thread says is all .

i remember the basic argument.

ancient egyptians were so stupid they put feces in their open wounds, but gods people had the knowledge to bury it.. my question is, did this actually appear in an official watchtower magazine or book?.

Amber Rose

You see, back then, people were so stupid and had no medical knowledge that they thought poop was to be used as a healing agent. It took non-Istrealites how many hundreds of years to figure out that this was a bad idea. If they had read the Bible, they never would have come up with such a redicoulous idea because Jehovah told them to bury their poop outside of the camp. See how smart he is - this sort of wisdom can only come from beyond the human realm.

29

PO says: "Don't say you are a JW, tell them you are with an educational foundation if they ask"

by MinisterAmos in

last wednesday field circus school was about how to adeptly use the phone to make appointments to drop off material and find the ho at home.. .

lie says the po, do not tell them you are a dub!

i fell out of my chair right after looking up "lies" in the index of my jw bible..

Amber Rose

finallysomepride - Yep, that's what I'd do too, and a certain popular cartoon

http://www.stupidshiz.com/index.cfm?mode=media&media_id=06067593-1372-527D-08A67B600FC8BE1C

18

Crudely animated JW Debate...

by Tuesday in

jw
friends

hey everyone, i posted a video form of a comment debate on my channel.

the jw was really arrogant and i figured i should bring it to everyone's attention that he did horrible in the debate lol.

it's crudely animated, it's funny due to a chipmunk voice, but people have said they can learn from the technique i used in disarming every one of the usual jw techniques for "winning" biblical debates.

Amber Rose

This was a little long, I didn't see the whole thing but it was good. I have heard the argument that preaching from house to house was wrong but it seemed like too much of a bother to find out the reasons behind it. (NWT gives me anxiety.) Thanks for explaining this in an entertaining manner that mostly held my attention.

9

'But i hear all sorts of different views in the ministry'

by bohm in

jw
friends

i have heard this a couple of times:.

evil apostate: if, for example, a friend of you who wanted to be a mormon said: 'i have studied mormon throughoutly: its history, what it says, what the critics say, and i am sure mr. smith was under divine influence and this is the truth', but what if he had only studied mr. smith from mormon litterature - ie.

what mr. smith himself said about himself, his opposers, etc.. would you really think he had done a throughout examination?.

Amber Rose

Probably not the best approach, but I would be tempted to say - Really, people TALK to you in the ministry? You have actual conversations about religion with people in your door-to-door work? How often does this sort of thing happen to you? After 6 years of pioneering, I can probably count on one hand the number of people with whom I have gotten past "Hi".